Life goes on as if I were on a rollercoaster; I barely have time to be happy about one situation before other issues pop up, and then everything slows down—but that’s the least of it.

I’m still waiting to get rid of two houses. For one, I never see the light at the end of the tunnel. For the other, every day brings a new problem, whether it’s bureaucratic red tape, expenses to face, or hypocritical people who can’t understand the situation. Why hypocritical? Because if you’re the one who created the problem, if you want to get rid of your part of the house at all costs because it’s just a burden, and then they offer you the price equal to its actual value and you complain because you deem the offer too low, you’re a hypocrite because you want to make a profit—you don’t just want to get rid of it, you asshole! Among other things, they don’t even have a valid valuation in hand, so I ask myself… what the hell do you want???

Anyway, never mind the other house too. Since September 2nd, they’ve had all the paperwork to draw up the deed, and still not a single thing is moving. The only solution left is to be a fatalist: everything happens in the time and way it’s meant to, but this whole situation pisses me off a bit.

Even the songs I’m releasing don’t satisfy me. I ask myself, “Why should people start following me?” Maybe it’s a temporary lack of self-esteem, but it has prompted me to start bombarding myself with music again to compose new tracks. I think this willingness stems from this sense of frustration and dissatisfaction that has been accompanying me lately… I fear I won’t be able to pull out songs that offer something new compared to what I’ve already done, but there’s also curiosity to see where the listening work I’ve done so far will lead me! I feel like an old guy trying to have sex with a woman to see if he can still get it up. I hope this phase passes quickly.

I was definitely more carefree back when I was playing “Syphon Filter,” despite being in the middle of adolescence, school, existential crises, and romantic experiences for better or worse—still a good period! Syphon Filter was the first stealth game I played. I remember I was super cautious, I would crouch, move slowly, scout the whole area, and I found it quite complicated as a game… I must say I watched a gameplay a few years ago, and the player finished it basically spending most of the time running and shooting… what the hell! I was going through all that trouble, and that guy finished it by always rushing in! Well, I also saw a gameplay where someone finished The Last Ninja 2 by only facing 3 or 4 fights; the rest of the levels were spent running and jumping, and I remember my brother spending entire afternoons on the Commodore 64 with 4-5 other friends trying to finish it! As in all fields, there’s always the genius who manages to find the simplest way to reach the goal and those who manage to get there via the long road. I was 8 years old and played the Commodore until I was 13/14, and I was never able to play either “The Last Ninja” or any other Commodore game.

Anyway, going back to Syphon Filter, I remember it was a cool game for the time; it just had the misfortune of coming out after Metal Gear Solid, which was immediately a superlative game. The protagonist was more interesting, the various bosses were unique and some had dramatic backstories, even the radio communications were superb, and the final Metal Gear was the icing on the cake. At the time, I thought it was the “non plus ultra” of stealth action games, and maybe I was right. A super game that maybe people wouldn’t appreciate today just because of the graphics, and I swear to you, graphics make a big difference!

I suggested “The Witcher 3” to a friend of mine some time ago, which I consider the best game in its action-adventure RPG genre, and well, he told me that maybe the graphics were advanced in 2015, but now they are outdated and he can’t play it. Other gamers responded in the same way to another friend of mine who works in a video game store: “The graphics are old, I don’t like it!” Like saying: “Scarlett Johansson is old, I wouldn’t sleep with her!” Christ! Anyway, that’s their problem; Metal Gear Solid and The Witcher 3 are two legendary video games, and I thank heaven for being able to play them!

I remember the pangs in my heart when they caught me and the alarm sounded, and I ran to seek cover… I got that feeling again just thinking about it! How great! I hadn’t felt emotions like that since Resident Evil 2. Truly compliments to Hideo Kojima and his team of developers, they lightened up my adolescence!